Week Two! Fortunately, I’m not as rushed this week, so I can actually take my time with each of the songs. Which is great, because I can add more details to my reviews. And it also sucks, because I’ll understand why a song is so terrible. Music’s on the other side of the jump.
30. “I Just Had Sex” by The Lonely Island, feat. Akon
I will confess, I don’t like most Lonely Island songs. The one I have the most tolerance for is “Lazy Sunday.” But “I’m On A Boat,” “D*ck In A Box,” “Like A Boss,” and “Jizz In My Pants” all wear out my patience rather quickly. And unfortunately, so does this one. But it strangely does so in a different way. With all the other songs, I was annoyed by how they were performed. This one though, I can’t place my finger on it. It sounds nice enough, but it still bothers me. Maybe I’m just jaded.
65. “This Is Country Music” by Brad Paisley
Basically what the title says. This is your standard Country song celebrating the Country genre. And along with that comes some of the common tropes, such as going straight from the first verse to the second, making the third verse moody, and mentioning going home after traveling. Oh and in the outro, he lists some famous Country songs, some of which I do like. I suppose I would like this song if I liked Country. But I don’t, so the point of this song is kinda lost on me.
66. “Hit It Again” by 3OH!3
Oh god, these guys. Okay, let me get this straight. This song is about a guy hooking up with a girl that’s clearly out of his league, and who already broke up with him because he was cheating on her with her friends? Is that right? I think it is, and if so, the guy is the single most despicable protagonist in a song ever. Girls, I implore you, if a guy cheats on you, dump his ass, and dump his ass for good. Call me a prude, but no guy has any right to cheat on a girl.
81. “Do The John Wall” by Troop 41
This song is passable. The rapping’s okay, weakest in the first verse. The beat’s nothing special, but it helps move the song along. And the first half of the chorus is well done, though I don’t care for the second half, which is just a name repeated a few times. I was expecting worse based on the title. But considering it’s about a college basketball player, it’s actually pretty decent.
85. “I Am The Champion” by B.o.B
Well this is backwards for me. I don’t like the beat, and I hate the chorus, but I love the verses. It’s almost always the other way around for me. But in this song, the refrain is one shouted line, and the beat is too minimalist. And the rapping, the flow is perfect, and the lyric choices and wordplay are not only clever but actually make sense. I’m so torn on this song.
99. “Shake Up Christmas” by Train
Ugh. This song is well intended. But it’s so annoying. The instrumentation just kinda fills in the background. The verses are uninspired, especially for a Christmas song. And I swear, that refrain is gonna haunt my nightmares. This makes “Hey, Soul Sister” sound as creative as “Drops of Jupiter” in comparison. Can I have the old Train back now?
And that’s how we end off 2010, with a little bit of good, but mostly bad. Let’s hope things get better in the next year. And speaking of 2010, I have another list dedicated to the past year going up Wednesday. See you then.
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